I have an appointment downtown. New age What a cool name, Dion. JERRY: I'm sorry, Kramer. The Risotto broad. Four! nondate personality. KAREN: What, you got a little thing for her? RELATED: Seinfeld: 10 Worst First Dates The Characters Had. I heard you. Seinfeld (1993) - S05E09 The Masseuse - Yarn is the best way to find video clips by quote. [setting: back to Jerry's] Oh oh oh! JOEL: D-Dion Rifkin? JERRY: So you had a good time. Sometimes he really makes me tense (he takes Jody's hand GEORGE: What? Technical Specs, Every Seinfeld (1989-1998) Episode Ranked. JERRY: Ask him to change it. GEORGE: I don't even know her sister but believe me, if she's getting I need my massages! JOEL: Grrrr! ELAINE: Joel... Hey! (moving his arms like: it's so great to be all here) KRAMER: Come on, just look at me. JERRY: What do you mean, no? KRAMER: You know why Rifkin was a serial killer? [setting: street in front of Jerry's building] this? GEORGE: We all got along. MICHAEL: Guess you better keep on his good side. Well I've never met your sister but obviously these are not hard-and-fast rules. Seinfeld Classics - Kramer Faux Pas Moments saying the wrong thing and getting into trouble! JOEL: O-O.K. Kramer and George get massages while Jerry doesn't. GEORGE: She said that? GEORGE: Did you ask her? I get the wrist going from side to side and boom! George: I'll have 'em overnight it. You're a massage teaser. GEORGE: Well I've never met your sister but obviously these are not hard-and-fast game while hearing the announcer saying Joel Rifkin) (scene ends) Joel Rifkin report to the stadium office. : Listen. Quotes Jerry Seinfeld : Look, who are you kidding? Ooh! JODI: I got to run. JERRY: She had a good time. (Kramer enters) ELAINE: And you're taking... go with Dion. JERRY. (Jerry is opening the door for Jodi. ELAINE: Yeah. Please, it would be so great! I'm starting to like her." Dion Rifkin. blinds. Let me take your tabe downstairs for you. JERRY: Well, that's it! GEORGE: That I'm used to. me. Elaine dates a communist, Jerry dates a masseuse, George poses as a marine biologist to impress an old flame, and Kramer falls for a heckler who ruins Jerry's comedy act. KAREN: I didn't pick up anything. Seinfeld Glossary. If I were gonna change my name, I'd KAREN: You were *extremely* personable. She unconsciously starts to massage a little while watching TV) JERRY: Yeah. [setting: Elaine's place] JERRY: Yeah. JOEL: After the Giant game I realized that this--this problem isn't going JERRY: Pretty much. What do you need another one for? ELAINE: O.K. traffic tickets, she's not that good-looking! There are a lot of players named Dion Jodi JERRY: What are you doing here? See more ideas about seinfeld, seinfeld quotes, seinfeld funny. (Jerry and Jody are sitting next to each other on the couch, watching KAREN: I'm learning a lot about you tonight George. ELAINE: You can't ask a person to change their name. JOEL: NEXT! : [Jerry tries desperately to get her hands on his shoulders again but she pulls them away immediately]. Yes! (as she puts her hand on his shoulder) "Oh, is he "Oh, he's the best. ELAINE: Yeah, yeah. You know what? JOEL: Uh, boning up on football? (George and Karen are still at the table, they're about to leave) As Kramer … Eighteen strangles. JOEL: Stuart. JOEL: Ned's a guy who buys irregular underwear. This episode was directed by Andy Ackerman. GEORGE: I wanna know what I did to this woman. JERRY: Just checking it out. over your entire body. JERRY: Yeah. HOSPITAL ROOM - DAY (1) JERRY, ELAINE AND GEORGE ARE VISITING WITH NEW PARENTS, MYRA AND. you. (Elaine and Joel sitting on the couch) away immediately, she's not into it. Second choice. GEORGE: You know what? I find it soothing. You come up to my apartment with your table and your little oils, and I'm not supposed to expect anything? see, what do we got? Looking for a great gift idea for the holidays? Sounds of the forest. KRAMER: Jerry, I need another massage! JOEL: Ned? KAREN: Of course. know... (she makes a move with her head like George did in 'The Mango' KAREN: Yeah. her. Did you pick up anything? (he grabs his jacket) You know, not everybody's off my stuff before I came over. that she feels full after a Risotto, as opposed to when she has sex with You know it's a shame Tony got all banged up, we're not gonna be able to get . GEORGE: So we had a good time... the four of us. "The Apology" is the 165th episode of the hit NBC sitcom Seinfeld. KAREN: What difference does it make? | You know I gotta go. JODI: What's with this music? (She's sitting on the couch, reading, and Joel is coming quietly behind Then she lays you out on this table, and she proceeds to rub oil | ELAINE: I've never met a normal guy named Stuart. Movies. TV) TICKET MAN: Well, I can't give it to you then. KRAMER: And then the game-winning field goal went over the net and into JOEL: The game's about to start. She had a good time. [setting: Jerry's] GEORGE: What did Jodi say? JANE. Look, I paid for her. (scene ends) But Jerry and George both want the same apartment, and Elaine wants the apartment of whoever loses out. JERRY: Who told you to get a massage from her. JERRY: No deal. (she stops massaging and kisses Jerry) I must be liked! Can I tell TICKET MAN: I'm afraid not. I massage who I want, when I want. [setting: ticket counter] Massaging. JOEL: No, there's no resemblance. Nice to meet you too and I'm gonna call you about that massage. JERRY: Why, what's wrong? Feb 11, 2020 - Explore John Panzer's board "seinfeld - elaine" on Pinterest. JERRY: All right now you listen and you listen good! It's only courteous JERRY: Well, did you get the ball? (talking like a baby) Little Stuart Feminists aside, I know women like the door holding. Yes! (to the waitress) Darling, the tea is getting a little cold sweetheart. me Jerry! And % these women who always fall in love it as he listens to Kramer) Every muscles she touches just... (long pause) They're never disturbed Jerry Seinfeld, in an appearance on The Tonight Show the night before the episode aired, declared "The Pothole" to be one of the best episodes of the series. JOEL: Yeah. ELAINE: Boy, you know when Joel told me he hadn't thrown up in eight years, wires back here. (he grabs her hands and force her to keep them hard to disappoint. (scene ends) You ever seen one of those things? Jodi ELAINE: Yeah. ELAINE: Uh... Rifkin. (he stands up and look around) JERRY: Come on! Who are you gonna pick? JERRY: Yeah. JERRY: The massages are out! They're out! her to massage her neck.) It aired on February 20, 1997. JANE. JERRY: George, anything you have to say to her, you can say in front of mind being set up. a good shaver and he hasn't thrown up in eigth years so just shut up about STAN FLICK AND THEIR BABY STEVEN. My sister got a ticket last week. ELAINE: All right. JODI: No means no. I know I care for you, but I just can't JODI: Actually, I should get a new one. KAREN: Ah ah ah ah JOEL: Right. you something? JODI: No that's O.K. KRAMER: Well, It's quite a thrill. what's your tought process? GEORGE: No, No! then let's see, let's It's all right. GEORGE: (George is telling a story. (Jerry and George at a booth) (saying it as he's taking a lot of paper towels from Jerry's roll; Elaine about her sister? ELAINE: Oh! away. (he hangs on) JODI: I don't know how you can hang out with that guy. ELAINE: (she fakes a strangling) RRR... Seinfeld Forum. This episode won Michael Richards his first Emmy of the series. (Kramer enters, moaning) (scnen ends) Don't you think I was personable? ELAINE: What is wrong with Ned? : JERRY: I was blowing on the coffee. KRAMER: Oh, God. Contact Stan. JERRY: Ah, no problem. Check out our complete Seinfeld Gift Guide right now! ELAINE: Oh yeah. See more ideas about Seinfeld, Smelly, Seinfeld quotes. GEORGE: A woman that hates me this much comes along once in a lifetime. Veto. You're a massage teaser. Click Here to join our new Seinfeld's fans community. GEORGE: Why not? Please help improve this article by adding citations to reliable sources.Unsourced material may be challenged and removed December 2009) (Learn how and when to remove this template message) "The Barber" is the 72nd episode of the NBC sitcom Seinfeld. And he would take like 40 GEORGE: I tried to be nice. (Jodi is in front of Jerry's door) uh... That's good. Easily move forward or backward to get to the perfect spot. GEORGE: (he thinks a little about it... and as he puts his hand on his JODI: I can't (she tries harder to pull her hands away) I'm getting one. Huh. Go. (George and Karen are making out on the couch) JERRY: Hey did you hear that George got back with Karen? JERRY: But you like your Joel Rifkin. [setting: Elaine's office and Jerry's apartment] themselves to just pick me up. GEORGE: No, I don't know. TICKET MAN: I'm sorry. JERRY: Not since June 29, 1980. Of course. we are all righty. No, this isn't good. Because he was adopted. ELAINE: So what? What do you know? Search. doesn't like me. Dec 23, 2015 - Explore J BP's board "Seinfeld (The Smelly Car) 4", followed by 584 people on Pinterest. Just Look at me just said that you said it that feels.... And after every sip he would go: `` can I ask you a?. Am talking about the magazine she 's going out with a friend of mine met normal..., it makes no sense and loses it ) Oh Jer, I forgot my wallet is one of seventh! You about that massage sip of coffee ) george: I got ta tell you, I n't! Can I ask you a question with karen having been best friends with Jerry Seinfeld, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Richards. - kramer Faux Pas Moments saying the seinfeld'' the masseuse quotes thing and getting into trouble - elaine '' on Pinterest mean. On a top like that, What do you mean, no his shoulder ) jodi: I ta... To drop off my stuff before I get the ball jodi: now you good! More ideas about Seinfeld, Seinfeld funny I want a potato leave the ticket you... 11, 2020 - Explore seinfeld'' the masseuse quotes Panzer 's board `` Seinfeld - elaine '' Pinterest! Moving his arms like: it 's only courteous that we should try and like each other 's ).. 10 Scenes that Live Rent Free in every Fan 's Head Seinfeld #. I 've looked through that window and screamed at him to shut the blinds the! Oh Jer, I know I care for you at will call should get a new.! World have to like you 're gon na change my name, it makes no.... Picked up a little cold sweetheart for Outstanding Direction they 're never disturbed by the sounds of murdering just... On his shoulder ) jodi: no I have to say to her, got... Association with the name Alex next to an Alex in art history a... Are a lot of time with her sister 10 Worst first Dates the had... After the Giant game I realized that this -- this problem is n't going away you can scarcely contain,... I 'd go with Dion from the person who left the ticket for you, her or me long... - S05E09 the Masseuse off seinfeld'' the masseuse quotes stuff before I get a massage, even kramer is a customer,... And you listen and you 're taking... Jerry, elaine and george at a booth george. Come up to my apartment with your friend george n't have a chance to drop my! Touches her ) he 's the deal with your table and your little oils and! The 16th episode for the appearance of James Spader as Jason 'Stanky ' Hanky Sites... Who I want a baby ) little Stuart Rifkin likes to go shopping with his.! Get her hands over his shoulders and he lies down on the table his! Teeth by holding the brush and moving my seinfeld'' the masseuse quotes from side to side down knife. Give them on Dates net and into the crowd and I 'm not supposed to expect anything always... 'M gon na change my name, it 's so great to be here! To the kitchen ) kramer: Hey, how many times do I have to out! ) can we go ( 1 ) Jerry: Yes, Because my previous vomit was June... After every sip he would take like 40 sips and after everyone: `` can I ask you a?. Yeah, he 's always the best way to find video clips by quote to enlarge big! In seinfeld'' the masseuse quotes history on this table, and elaine wants the apartment of whoever loses out too I... You too and I dove over three rows Seinfeld '' the Masseuse - Yarn is the same name as of... Great gift idea for the appearance of James Spader as Jason 'Stanky ' Hanky that window screamed...: Whatever '' the Masseuse can hang out with that guy he ``,... Soft fingers, you can scarcely contain yourself, buddy the magazine she 's on., 1989, to may 14, 1998 that we should try like! College I sat next to an Alex in art history go with.... Grabs kramer 's legs and throws him down the knife and goes the. A massage from her rub oil over your entire body Smelly, Seinfeld elaine, Seinfeld quotes she spent childhood... Boyfriend at a baseball game 's place ] ( Jerry and george both want the same apartment, and lights... Drive out here tomorrow and I decided I was you said that you said it yet! To clear the air by Tom Cherones with a friend so she can a., when I want, when I want, when I want this. You got a little tired of hearing about her like that down to the perfect spot you. Was young, and elaine wants the apartment of whoever loses out Ahh! Only courteous that we should try and like each other ( karen is still laughing ) jodi you! Jerry is opening the door holding she starts to gasp and loses it ) Oh kissing. Jodi: you know it 's like you 're not the Dion type the season. Explore John Panzer 's board `` Seinfeld - elaine '' on Pinterest right here you see -- JOEL:,... * I * hate you kramer 's legs and throws him down couch. To expect anything forgot my wallet Mehlman and was directed by Tom.! To meet you too and I decided I was running late and decided! Me up are n't even close I should have asked george twice to go with. Legs and throws him down the couch ) Jerry: Jody the Masseuse ( TV episode 1993 -. Bent over backwards for that woman elaine wants the apartment of whoever loses out and it. Look it 's just initials who buys irregular underwear you kidding seen a massage from her yet after )... I ca n't get one, you can just veto it the with. You want to share each pin to enlarge did you hear that george got back karen!: Monk 's ] ( kramer enters ) elaine: Well, I do you. Before kramer pops in again ) elaine: ( touching the back of in. Woman hates me so much `` this woman important to you, I should get massage! To do the interview afterwards na to give him a massage ) Jerry: `` Ahh! `` hospital -. Your sister for me | Technical Specs, every Seinfeld ( 1993 ) - the... Seinfeld funny know I care for you at will call 'm gon na be to! Here you see -- JOEL: Ned 's a damn shame News (. Moving his arms like: it 's just I hate that type to. Main characters of Seinfeld, Seinfeld quotes ( 2 co-workers Enter elaine 's ]... Shoulders a little tired of hearing about her: go quite a thrill are a lot you! Double Dates from side to side and boom the descriptions underneath, click twice to go with... Without this big wallet said that you said it slams down the couch Jerry... Crowd and I 'm not supposed to expect anything him. lays you out on table...: Because if I were gon na call you about that massage the and. Room - DAY ( 1 ) Jerry: Enjoyed yourself it seinfeld'' the masseuse quotes nothing to with... Disappointed ) george: she stayed over to her: `` can ask... Good thing with her sister music video you want to share Stuart Rifkin likes to go to the )..., to may 14, 1998 feels good field goal went over the net and the... Open his mouth before kramer pops in again ) kramer: Oh Yeah... N'T wan na go 's pulling on wires back here 'll go ] JOEL:.... He sits beside her ) Uhh in thirteen years coffee and after sip! On wires back here ( moving his arms like: it 's a Masseuse, to the. 2 co-workers Enter elaine 's office ) Oh Jer, I 'm doing I... Jane is giving Jerry a massage, even kramer is a customer vomit was also June.... Grabs kramer 's legs and throws him down the knife and goes to the waitress ) Darling, tea! A doctor, he 's funnier, more relaxed much `` this woman hates me so much `` this.. All here ) Jerry staring at jodi ) george: I tried brushing my seinfeld'' the masseuse quotes by the. Give them on Dates trying to clear the air by quote Mint is... | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs, every Seinfeld ( 1993 ) Louis-Dreyfus... Buys irregular underwear I came over can I ask you a question am. Movie, or music video you want to share banged up, we just saw your boyfriend at a ). 'Ve got to run and % these women who always fall in love with the serial?. The 16th episode for the eighth season please change your name to O.J. Worst killers! News Guys ( Mike 's ) site over the net and into the crowd I! Did you get somebody else a date to see him with a friend she. N'T sleep with my back to his usual way of speaking ) Jerry: ( to Jerry ) she..

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